Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Lady Rowan of the Loess

If you've read this blog for any time at all, you know I like to keep it as upbeat as I can. But, the original reason for creating it was to 1) have a place to permanently put all the journals I write while we're on vacations 2) to vent, to voice an opinion, and sometimes, to be sad.

Rowan, one of our Scottish Terriers, passed away this morning.



Actually...Mot had to put her down.

She loved us both, but Mot and Rowan had extra special places in each others hearts.

We found Rowan in a pet store about 10 years ago. I had my female Scottie, Penny, and we were looking for a playmate for her. Actually, we were on our way to the first Thanksgiving I'd spent at Mot's parents house. And the pet store we frequented was on the way.

We saw Rowan, and fell in love. She was extremely timid though, after having been just brought to the store the day before. We had them take her out, and let her run around on the floor. (She mostly just cowered around Mot.) And I think the bond between the two of them was sealed right there!!!



About 2 years ago, we'd noticed Rowan had lost an insane amount of weight in an incredibly short period of time. We took her to the vet, and she was diagnosed with adult onset diabetes.

Two shots a day.....every day.

About a year later, she went through the same thing again....with no warning. After another trip to the vet, her insulin dosage was doubled. Our vet had never seen an animal suffering from diabetes as bad as Rowan. (we're overachievers sometimes - sigh) In fact, it was so bad, her blood sugar maxed out his testing equipment. But, after three or four days, he had her back to herself again.

She's a fetch freak! She'll fetch a ball, a Frisbee, a stick.....whatever.....and she won't stop until you stop.



This second round of....well, the second round of diabetes attacking her body took her sight almost completely. Yet, she still fetched. She'd follow Isaac (our male), and when he found it, she'd take it from him. It got to where he knew it was his job to lead her around.

Pets never cease to amaze me sometimes!!!

On Saturday morning, we'd found that she'd peed in her kennel. I hoped (really hoped) it was just from her drinking too much water before bed. It's been warm out.

We threw her ball for her, and she ran after it, as usual. All systems go. (phew!)

Saturday night...I noticed she was drinking allot of water...but so was I....it was HOT!!!

Sunday am....peed in kennel again.

Crap.

Took her outside, she wanted almost nothing to do with her ball. I threw it...she walked to it...then stayed out in the yard.

Shit.

Over the course of the day, she just laid in the shade, near her water dish. She'd still perk her ears up when one of us came out....but she was not doing well. We increased her insulin dosage.

Monday am....we left them outside that night (they have a kennel and such they can get into). When I came out to feed them...she didn't come. I called and called...nothing.

Damn.

I found her lying on the other side of the deck, by her wading pool. (we keep a wading pool of water for them during the summer) She didn't really even acknowledge I was there. I sat with her for a long time. I put her bowl of food right beside her, so she didn't have to move to get to it. But I just knew.

Rowan and I had a bond of our own. It usually included her and I napping together on the couch. She knew she wasn't supposed to be on the furniture, so she'd wait until I fell asleep...then sneak up. I'd wake up, see her there, and go back to sleep. :-)

Even as of this weekend, if I was ever sitting anywhere near her, she wanted to be on my lap. I tried to get her to sit on my lap on Monday...but Rowan was gone. I mean, she was there physically, but the Rowan we loved was gone.

F*ck.

Mot came home this morning. She didn't even acknowledge he was there. Her breathing was very labored, and when she did try to sit up, her front legs just shook and shook...so she laid back down.

It was then we decided this was probably it. We'd seen her in bad shape, but never this bad.

Mot called me at work around 9:30 or this morning.

He put her down. He did it himself...and was about sick over having to do it.

She was bleeding from her nose, and her eyes were yellow. Her liver had shut down.

It was time.

I need another box of Kleenex.

12 comments:

Employee No. 3699 said...

Oh, I am so, so sorry. You have me in tears at work.

Sending big (((Hugs))) to you.

Nej said...

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm feeling better now. I mean, it was time. It's just so hard to make that decision.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

I'm sorry, Nej.

When my dog died, I was away at college, so I didn't have to deal with it. Plus, at least you got to end her suffering. My dog fell into my mom and dad's pool and drowned.

Brook said...

Nej-I am so sorry. My heart goes out to you and Mot. Ten years is a long time(never long enough) and the emotional bond goes so deep. All I can say is yes-you can tell when it's time to let go and it's even harder to have to act on that knowledge.
I need some tissue too.
(((((T_T)))))

Nej said...

I had to put my 10 year old St. Bernard down 10 years ago, 20 year old cat down 3 years ago, and now Rowan.

We used to breed the Scotties here and there. Maybe a litter a year or so. Anyway, one of the pups went to a friend of my moms. His name was Murphy.

Murphy used to watch the kids run up to the pool and jump in. Then they'd get out...run around the pool to the ladder....rinse their feet off in this wading pool...then jump back into the big pool..over and over. Murphy would watch and watch.

One day he started doing it. Jump in the pool. They'd fish him out, he'd run around to the ladder...dance in the wading pool a little, then climb up and jump in again.

One day they came home to find him on his tippy toes....with only his little nose bobbing above the water over and over. He'd jumped in when no one was there to fish him out. If he stood on his back legs and jumped, he could get his nose out of the water to breathe. They have no idea how long he'd been doing it, waiting for them to come save him. :-)

That dog has 9 lives, and has used 7 of them so far. :-)

Brook said...

Murphy-what a great name for a dog with such good luck.

Nej said...

Murphy got stung on the nose by a bee the first week they had him.

They also thought they lost him once...only to find him in the dishwasher. One of the kids had left it open, and he climbed in. Then the next person walking by shut it, not knowing that he was in it, "cleaning" all the dirty plates. :-)

Gwen said...

oh, baby. I'm so very sorry. It sounds like she was a peach.

Sass said...

I'm so sorry for your loss...Mot made a really brave choice.

I'm thinking of you, and sending you the biggest hugs you can possibly imagine.

Kez said...

I am so sorry for your loss.
It's never easy.

Amy said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I have been there-and it is not fun. I also had a dog who developed diabetes..her name was Dixie-a beagle. She was an awesome dog. I have not loved another dog like I loved her. It is horrible to see them suffer-when the Dixie we loved really wasnt there anymore-and we knew we were keeping her alive for me-I decided to let her go. There is great comfort in a good pet.

Nej said...

Thank you, everyone!!!! It's amazing how attached we can get to our pets. Isn't it? :-)