Friday, January 30, 2009

I'm speechless.....

In December, a Flybe Airline flight from Cardiff, Wales, was preparing to land as scheduled at Charles de Gaulle airport in Paris when the pilot announced that they had to return to Cardiff because, he said, "Unfortunately, I'm not qualified to land the plane in Paris." Because of the heavy fog, the plane would have to be instrument-landed, and the pilot had not yet completed certification. [USA Today-Metro (London), 12-18-08]

Maybe it's just me, but I prefer my pilots to be certified for all circumstances that may arise while they are piloting my plane.

I understand there are always things you can't be prepared for....but fog?

I found it, I found it!!!!!!

My watch...it was gone....but now it's back. I opened up my jewelry box this morning, and there was my watch. Just staring me in the face.

I'm in that jewelry box almost every day!

EVERY DAY!!!

It was possible my cat stole the watch, but it's not possible she put it back.

What do you do.....

.....when you are married to a guy that got to experience things when he was young, and you didn't?

How do you go out and do things, when he doesn't want to go along? How do you handle wanting to try new things, and step outside the box...when it's a box he's been outside of already and doesn't want to go?

How do you explain to him you want to go on a vacation that might be more work than vacation?

How do you verbalize the need to do something you feel would be an accomplishment?

Something you want to do so you can say "I did that." Something you can experience that not everyone gets (or wants) to do. Something that wasn't easy, something that wasn't going to be 100% pleasant the entire time.

Something that sounds like fun to you. But once you do it, and find it wasn't fun....you can at least you can say "I tried that."

What if you really don't mind if he doesn't want to go, because you know not everyone wants to do the same things you do. You understand it might not be his thing. But don't want to fall into the separate vacation trap.

How do you tell him you wished he was just a little excited about your excitement? How do you tell him it frustrates you when he comes up with all the reasons your idea isn't going to work, or is going to be too expensive...but if it's his plan, he emails you links, he talks about it constantly - price be damned.

Why is it if it's his dream, what he wants....you can make it work.....but if it's what you want to do, he points out how it's going to be expensive and not fun?

How can you compete with the rush of skydiving?

The thrill of riding a superbike?

How can you possibly compete with the idea of a new puppy???



How do you tell him when even though he may say he's supportive, he has a really strange way of showing it?

How do you remind him that you have (more than once) spent a week of vacation doing something you would rather dig your eyeballs out with a spoon, than do?

Do you use your "it's my turn" card and go on a vacation where he'll be miserable and grouchy?

Or do you say "Fine, stay home, I'll go."?



Photo found online @ http://www.publishersweekly.com/blog/860000286/post/570022857.html

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Ka-Bong!!!

When I was a kid, my dad and I would bump foreheads (lightly) and say "Ka-Bong." It was something that started when I was really, really young.

"Ka-bong" is the first thing I thought of when Mot sent me this news story and video.

WELLINGTON, New Zealand - Two prisoners in New Zealand are facing more charges, and major embarrassment over an escape attempt gone bad.

The men were handcuffed together as they fled a courthouse, but apparently forgot that little fact as they ran to opposite sides of a light pole, with predictable results. The men slammed into each other and fell to the ground. End of escape.

Jailers nabbed them as they struggled to their feet.



Location, location, location...

Torvald Alexander, 39, was able to chase away the unlucky home invader who hit his apartment on Dec. 31 in Edinburgh, Scotland, according to a BBC News report. The two men inadvertently came face to face just as Alexander was preparing to leave for a New Year's party, dressed in full regalia as Thor, the hammer-wielding Norse god of thunder. Alexander said the burglar took one look at him, turned and climbed hurriedly out a window, sliding down a sloped roof and landing on the ground, where he took off running. [BBC News, 1-2-09]

It's dark anyway.....

When the power goes out.....it wakes me up. My eyes were closed so it couldn't be the lack of light from my alarm clock. Last night, it was our carbon monoxide detector. For some reason, it had to beep, to announce the lack of power. I'm guessing this is a safety system....Hey! I have no power, I can't tell you if you're going to die. Please put batteries in me!!!

One way to get Mot fired from his job is being late. The fire department frowns upon it. (They also frown upon selling drugs from the parking lot, and stuff like that....but I'm talking about non felonies.) So, I had to wake Mot up at 2:00 this morning so he could go get his cell phone and set the alarm.

Have you ever noticed how darn bright cell phones are in the dark? You can read a book by the light those 2x2 inch screens!! :-)

I, on the other hand, didn't really care if I was late for work. When the electricity gods hand you a valid reason for being late, you should take the opportunity and run with it!! So I snuggled back into the blankets and fell asleep.

Sort of.

I was sleeping, I didn't need light.....the furnace gets turned down anyway.....we have nobody living on a ventilator. But for some reason, my body still wouldn't let me sleep. A deep relaxing REM sleep that is.

Why did the power go out? Was it just our house? Will the pipes freeze? Do I need to get ice for the freezer to keep that deer meat cold and from spoiling? Blah, blah, blah.

Just when my brain finally shut down...BEEP. The carbon monoxide detector again! This time, a beep every 10 seconds or so. Why? To let us know that the power was back on, of course!!!

Ugh.

I'm going to have to have a talk with that thing when I get home. :-)

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Communication breakdown (updated)

How, may I ask, do you convince your husband that communication via methods that require typing is the best option for you when you're at work?

Messenger, email, something other than a phone. Because everyone in the friggin' state can hear my when I'm on my phone at my desk??? It carries down the hallway, it carries into other offices.......but typing, that's silent. (well, except for the clicking) I can talk to him all day long, as long as it involves typing.

Maybe the issue is that he really doesn't want to talk to me? I hadn't thought of it that way until now. Hmmmm......

He, on the other hand, wants me to call him....so he can still not speak. And, in the case of today, be an ass. Either option is not attractive to me.

I'm crazy, I know!!!

My treadmill died. Dead, dead, dead. But it was a sudden aneurysm or stroke....no grueling heart attack or flesh eating disease that takes days. No, one minute running...next minute - not running. Wham!!!!

I've mentioned it daily since the day of death.....and Mot doesn't seem to understand the urgency. I don't think he knows how often I use it. He said it might be a fuse, and would look at it. When I talked to him today, I asked if there was a bunch of hair inside. He didn't know...didn't take it apart. "You didn't?" I asked. "No, but I will."

Really? You've had two full days off at home, when you could....and you haven't. When are you going to do it? I know you had to work yesterday, but so did I. But I still get to come home and go grocery shopping. Instead of spending my whopping 2 hours of home time at home...I get to go to the store. Because he didn't want to put socks on and get dog food....while he was home...all day today!!!

I love him dearly, but some days, I just can't take it. I took out the garbage, emptied the dishwasher and filled it back up. Did a load of laundry and picked up the living room. All this morning. He doesn't want to drive to the pet store (right up the street from our house) to get dog food because he doesn't want to put socks on!!!!!!!!

(banging my head on my desk)

He'll read this some day and be mad at me. It's how it works. I make a good point, and he gets mad. But damn!!!!

(Hi Honey!!!! Love you! Kiss Kiss!)

There were two things on his honey do list today. The list that he asks I give him, because he can't tell when things need done by walking around the house...he needs a list. I've been assured it's a male thing, so I leave a list.

Today's list.

* Put new batteries in thermostat. (I tried, and can't get the &%*#& cover off.)
I purposefully didn't take the thermostat off it's schedule this morning...so at about 9:00, the temp will go down to 55. I set it this way so the furnace isn't running all day while I'm at work. On mornings when he's going to be home, I try to remember to take it off schedule so he doesn't freeze. Today, I didn't change it, thinking that eventually he'll get cold and need to turn it up. And, while turning it up, notice that it's flashing Low Battery.

But, I still put it on the list...because I've learned not to assume anything.

** Look at treadmill.
I realize the error of my list. I should have written "Look IN treadmill." Silly me!!!!!

I'm a slave driver, aren't I???

You know, these blogs are kinda nice for the venting of frustrations, aren't they? I already feel better!!!!! Thanks!

** Update: He's called me, after I hung up on him. Treadmill is running, thermostat batteries are replaced. I'll leave the post up...it's kinda funny. :-)

*** Additional update: My hubby is wonderful. He cooks dinner almost every night he's home. He helps clean the house up if I ask. He tries to make me laugh when I'm down. He's not a slacker in any way, shape or form. I, on the other hand, am female. So I think like a female. Men seem to run on a different clock and schedule than women. Agreed? What I may think is a big deal, is small time to him. It's probably not fair that I complain about it. But - complaining about here keeps me from starting an argument that really doesn't needed started. In marriage, 90% of the arguments you have are over the dumbest, smallest, most insignificant things.

For example, our sink has two sides. If we put the dirty dishes on one side, the other is left open...so I don't have to move all kinds of dirty dishes to use it. Mot doesn't understand my logic. "What happens when we get a sink with one tub, not two?" My thought is that we'll deal with it when that day comes. He wants to start practicing now. :-)

Forgive me.

On this day in 1547, King Henry the VIII died.

After reading about it, a song popped into my head...and hasn't left. I thought I'd share the pain with others.

"I'm Henry the 8th I am, Henry the 8th I am, I am....."




If you make it through the first minute, you can stop watching....I did. I'm leaving now for a shot of insulin. Talk to you later!!!! :-)

Oh, I forgot.......

......to push some creative genius off onto my wonderful blog readers!!!! "Waaay Back When-sday" ideas anyone????

Come on, everyone has a burning question just dying to be asked, right????

Some embarrassing tidbit you'd never think I'd write about, only to be surprised to find that I'll write embarrassing stories freely.

Maybe you want to know if I've done something, in hopes of finding out you're not the only one to have done it as well?

No???

Nothing??

Waaaay Back When-sday, Episode 3 (part 3)

In case you're just joining us.....here's part 1 and part 2 for you to read and get caught up.

Korean Bath House - part 3 (the end of the story).

As a little recap....so far we'd been baked, boiled, tenderized, peeled and basted. And were now being ushered into yet another room of torture.

This last room had a calming feel to it. Walking in made me think that maybe, the torture was complete...and we were finally going to get to do some relaxing.

WRONG!!!

I mean, it started out fine enough. They lure you in...and lay you down on a very comfortable massage table. They put some cucumber gunk all over you face, but a hot cloth over your eyes. There is calming music playing in the background. They massage your arms and your shoulders. Things are looking good.

Then I hear a noise, down by my feet. It's the sound of a leather satchel with metal instruments being unrolled. I know, I know...I've watched too many espionage, torture the information out of the informant, movies. But that's exactly what it sounded like.

And that's exactly what it was!!!!!!!

The woman at the end of my table, took one of my feet in her hands. I'd heard of reflexology. I'd heard that it was a wonderful thing. But for someone like me, things weren't looking good. I have the most ticklish feet ever.

EVER!!!

Not that it would have mattered, being ticklish wasn't a problem in this situation. Being adverse to pain, on the other hand, was. This woman started jamming metal instruments into the bottom of my foot. She'd drag and scrape the things along the sides. Digging in. Poking, prodding. How the objects didn't break the skin and enter INTO my foot, I'll never know.

Every so often, there would be a break in the action, and she'd come back with a different tool. Holy cow. If I had any national secrets, I would have given them all up and then some, right then! I'd make stuff up, I'd sell my sister into slavery...what ever it takes for them to stop torturing my foot!!!!

And that's when it hit me. Oh My God...they've only done one foot! I have to go through all of this again. There's no way I'll make it out of here alive. My feet are thudding and pounding and burning so badly, I don't think I could have stood up if I wanted to.

This went on for a good 30 minutes, before switching to my other foot. I was sweating and fighting back tears. I'm not a wuss when it comes to pain. I've had reconstructive shoulder surgery...there's nothing that hurts more. And I did it with relatively little complaining. (mostly I complained about being bored, and not being able to put my own bra on)

Finally, the hell was over. I could hear the tools being put away. They started massaging my legs. My calf muscles (heck, every muscle in my body) had tensed up pretty hard that last hour...so the pampering was a welcome activity.

Until the brush came out. I started getting pedicures a number of years ago, when a pregnant friend of mine decided she had to go. She could no longer reach her feet. We still go together every once and a while. When you get a pedicure, they take a scrub brush along the bottom of your feet.

Yeah, not my feet. Remember the ticklish thing? It's an involuntary action. I about took the head off of one unsuspecting pedicurist. When the brush comes out, I explain I'm ticklish, and we should probably skip that step.

Unfortunately, as was proved with the exfoliation lady smacking me in the forehead in the previous room, the communication barrier has left little to be desired all evening. And, try as I might, I couldn't get her to put the d*mn brush away! I tried laughing and pulling my foot back, all the ladies in the room laughed...and my woman grabbed my foot in a death lock. I tried curling my toes and making it difficult for her. No go....she wouldn't stop. The woman was a pit bull!!!!

When she was completely done with my feet, she grabbed my leg, and bent it at a 90 degree angle, so my foot was sitting on the table. She took a metal rod and ran it up along the inside of my calf of my right leg.

Well....that was interesting. I wonder why she did t.................................OH MY GOD!!!!!!!

About ten seconds after running that rod along my calf, the pain hit. I've never felt anything like it in my life!!! It felt as though someone was holding a hot poker on the side of my leg...right where she had taken the rod. It burned so bad. What did she just do to me???? I couldn't move my leg, it was paralyzed.....except for the burning sensation that wasn't easing up.

This was when I realized there were more of us in the room. If anything, the ladies had gotten me to forget anyone else was there. I started listening. You could hear small whimpers and such throughout the room. One chorus member let out a small shriek.

I heard someone closer to me sit up suddenly. NOPE! That was me sitting up. She'd just run that metal rod up the other calf, and I guess my body went into fight or flight mode. Since I wasn't running out the door, I can only assume I was readying my self for battle. :-)

The hot cloth fell off my eyes, and I was finally able to look around the room. There were people with tears, there were people looking around with huge eyes, and there was one person asleep. How can you possibly sleep with all of this going on?

I was led back to the locker room where I could change. Everyone rode back to the hotel in silence. No one talking to each other. Shell shocked.

I'm all for experiencing other cultures. There were MANY things we did during those 10 days that I enjoyed beyond belief. I went outside my comfort zone and ate some pretty crazy things. I'm glad I went to the bath house. Would I ever do it again? No. I'll stick with American spas. I hear it's more of a pampering experience. :-)

Monday, January 26, 2009

Weekend Update #2

This weekend was great. They always feel too short, but at least this one didn't feel it was a total of only 2 hours.

We didn't have quartet rehearsal Friday night....so I was at home, by myself. Heaven! I love my husband dearly, but those nights when I'm home, by myself, with no plans.....they are few and far between. It's a time to recharge.

Unfortunately, it was also Maverick hockey night. We split season tickets with my parents this year. They go Friday nights, and we go Saturdays. Mot's and my dad's schedules are crazy enough, that it seemed like the right thing to do. WE ARE NOT splitting tickets next year. No way, no how. We tried it, we gave it a go...and it sucks!

Mot was working the Friday night game as a paramedic, and my mom (who I've taken to 3 or 4 games Mot wasn't able to attend) was there with a friend. Yes, she brought someone else...not the daughter that ALWAYS brings her if Mot can't use our ticket. Argh! :-)

It was a smokin' awesome game. Here's a quick recap (quick - for those non hockey readers).

Opponents score 2 goals, we have 0. In the third period, we (the Mavs) score 2 to tie the game and go into overtime. Mavs win in the shootout! Yeah!!! Terribly exciting, people standing the whole third period, energy high, good game....I'm at home. Getting text message updates. (sigh)

I, instead, got out a Biggest Loser Weight Loss Yoga DVD I'd gotten that day through Netflix. Hey - it looked interesting...give me a break! It kicked my butt, as it should have...then I went to bed (only to be drug out of my sleep by my mother...calling to again tell me about the game, on the phone this time).

Saturday am, I got up and went down to use the treadmill. I'm probably 40-45 minutes into my workout, and the thing stops. The control panel were still working fine, but the motor stopped. There was no smoke, no burning smell...the motor just stopped, as though I'd hit the kill switch. One minute I'm walking at a good 4 mph clip, and the next WHAM - it stops...and I'm being hurled forward into the control panel by my forward momentum.

(I can't believe it didn't bruise!)

I immediately looked around to see if anyone saw me slam into the control panel (yes, I'm at home...there's no one there, but I'm usually at the gym, so it's second nature to look and see who is lucky enough to get a laugh from my antics). My cat was staring at me, but that didn't count. :-)

I turned the machine off, and lifted weights next, hoping that maybe the machine needed a break and would work if I turned it on later (it didn't). Mot seems to think an internal fuse blew...I hope so...treadmills aren't cheap to replace.

Mot came home from work, and we both got showered and dressed, we headed out to pick up the kids. Brandon (12) and Lauren (6), my niece and nephew, have been begging us to take them out for an afternoon...and I've been promising we would since before the holidays. Today was the day.

We hit out favorite bookstore, and they were able to buy a couple books each. We went to Dave and Busters to eat and play video games. We went to Maggie Moo's for ice cream. And then we ended the afternoon going to Game Stop so they could each pick up a game for their Nintendo DS.

Those two crack me up!!!! They are growing up so quickly!

After dropping them off at home, we headed home to get changed for the hockey game. We were meeting our hockey friends before the game at a Mexican restaurant downtown. Mot, the night before, had lucked into reserved FREE parking for the rest of the hockey season, so we left early to find our new parking. (Don't' ask how he landed the free parking passes to a reserved lot immediately behind the arena....he lucks into these things. It's crazy!!!)

We all ordered dinner, and multiple pitchers of margaritas. Ah, tequila, nectar of the gods. :-) After paying the bill, we all speed walked to the arena and got there just as the game was starting. Perfect timing!

Quick game recap.

*@^$%(*&#^%*#&^)(#*^)(*#_($@)($&-

I'll translate. In first 9 minutes of game, opponent scored 3 friggin' goals. Mavs switched goalies (I've NEVER seen them do that when an injury wasn't involved!!!) The opponent managed to score three MORE goals. We spent the bulk of the game trying to ignore the carnage playing out in front of us...by gabbing and talking. We met Steve and Danny at hockey games last year. Their tickets were right in front of ours. This year, we started talking even more, and have discovered how much we have in common. It's pretty funny actually! With 3 minutes left in the game, I got up to run down to the restroom. I wanted to get there before the rush after the game, and before we had to walk through our zero degree weather outside.

Just as I was reaching for the bathroom stall door.....train horns blare, all 10,000 people in the arena go nuts!

"You've got to be f*cking kidding me!!!"

The lady at the sink washing her hands starting laughing. "Don't you just hate it when that happens?"

Ugh!!!!!

So, the final score was 6 to 1. I missed the 1 - because I was in the restroom. Wouldn't you know!

The 4 of us decided the horrible game was reason to go back to our Mexican restaurant for more margaritas.

Actually, we would have gone if we'd won....we were just using the most convenient excuse. :-)

Steve and I poured one glass out of the first pitcher, and called it quits....since we were both driving. The other two guys finished the first (and second) pitchers for us. They were also drinking beer at the game, plus the margaritas at dinner.

Mot was getting a little.....ummm.....loopy.

We called it a night around midnight (only because the weather was starting to look pretty interesting, it was snowing pretty well by then), but we made plans to play cards at their place next weekend.

On the way home, my loverly oh-so-drunk hubby declares..."you might want to pull over...sometime...really quick."

I hid my smile as best I could and pulled off on the shoulder of the expressway.



Notice the snow falling on his jacket. But most importantly, notice how I'm holding his coat, so he won't fall out of the Jeep. Even though I was worried about him falling out, I still made sure to free one hand to pull my digital camera out of my purse.

Be prepared, that's my motto. (And the girl scouts, don't tell them I stole it.)

Mot couldn't walk a straight line to save his soul. I haven't seen him that drunk in quite a while. Good thing he's a funny drunk!!

Sunday was pretty uneventful. Mot went to work, against his better judgement. He still wasn't walking very straight...probably had something to do with the pounding in his head. :-) I lazed around the house most of the day, paid some bills, napped on the couch, and then got the house picked up before the quartet arrived for rehearsal. I scooped 3 or so inches of snow off of our driveway, and went to bed.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

It was a drive by...

...a drive by "Mot-ing".

I got a phone call while Robin and I were out to lunch today. Before you think it, let me explain. I usually don't answer my phone while at lunch with other people like that, but I knew Mot was talking about taking the Ducati out, and I wanted to make sure he was OK. With all of the sand on the streets, I worry about the bike slipping around while he's riding.

(my mother hen tendencies come out once in a while)

Anyway...this is how that phone call went.


Nej: Hello?

Nej: Hello?

Connection is lost. The call came from home, so I tried calling him back.

Busy signal.

I try again, busy signal.

My phone rings.

Nej: Hello?

Mot: What did you do with my headphones? (it wasn't asked nicely, he was mad, upset, grouchy, grumpy and mean sounding)

Nej: (immediately on the defensive) I didn't do anything with them. They are probably where you last had them.

Mot: YOU were using my shuffle, what did YOU do with them.

Nej: I don't wear YOUR headphones, I try to not share earwax when possible. Look in "the drawer". (you all know what I mean by 'the drawer'....every house has one)

Mot: Why did you hang up on me twice?

Nej: (sigh - like I did it on purpose?) Because I'm a shit that way.

Mot: hangs up on me

I put my phone down on the table and just stared at it. What the heck was that all about???

Robin: What the heck was that all about? (we share brains sometimes, it's spooky)



Update: Mot arrived here at work as I was typing this post. He's in full riding gear.

As he's taking off his helmet, I ask him if it's safe. He skirts the issue by talking about how it's still "chilly" to be riding, but feels great!

I asked him how his headphones were working. (no way am I letting this go) And also asked him where he found them.

"Right where you said they'd be....damn it."

I asked him if he was going to apologize for being an ass...he said no. He mumbled something about me being his wife, and how, somehow, that makes it OK. Then he smiled that "oh come on...you can't be mad at me when I smile at you like this....right?" smile and gave me a kiss.


I'm such a pushover. :-)

It turns out that besides the battle with me on the phone, he also had a battle with his riding coat before he left the house. I wonder how many other innocent bystanders were incorrectly accused of a wrong doing this morning?

I should probably talk to the toaster when I get home and see if it's OK. :-)

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Hell hath no fury...

There's a woman in the parking lot across the street from our building.....ramming her car into this dude's SUV.

Over and over and over.

He was in the SUV, then the big dummy got out. She missed hitting him by inches at the most.

Waaaay Back When-sday, Episode 3 (part 2)

The Korean Bath House, Part 2 (here's part 1 if you missed it)

So, where was I????

Oh yes. I remember now.

We had just been placed back into the oven, after our botched escape attempt. Our captors were nice enough to bring us glasses of water (Of which we couldn't drink. I had a 13 hour plane ride home the next day, and DID NOT want to spend it in the airplane restroom suffering from digestive distress.)

Finally, at least another 20 minutes later, the bath house ladies arrived and began ushering us from the oven to the changing room. (they didn't even have to pinch of knees to see if we were done this time!!!)

Now that I think back, I know they were trying to stagger our leaving "the oven" for a reason....but at the time, it was terrifying. By the time I was finally able to leave, there were only 3 of us left. We had decided there was no way they were going to separate the three of us. We'd fight to the death if need be.

United we stand, divided we....well, we didn't know...but we weren't going to find out.

Once in the locker room, we were ordered to undress immediately (against our better judgement). I was friends with most of these ladies. I saw them at rehearsals a minimum of once a week. So, my eyes were carefully pointed towards the ceiling, the back wall, and anywhere else that would keep their naked bodies out of my line of sight. It wasn't something I wanted to have come to mind every time I saw them. Ugh!

Once we were properly in a state of undress, they led us through that mystery door. I didn't want to be the first through. Hell, I didn't want to be the last through either. I just wanted to put my Levi's back on and run!!!!

The room we entered was.....hmmmm....how do I describe it? It was wet, foggy, steamy, white porcelain tiles, floor to ceiling, and...well, it was....ummm.......noisy. But I'll get to that in a minute.

The first place we were told to go, was a wall, with shower heads. Made sense, we had sweat like nobodies business in the oven. I suppose we were pretty stinky by then?

My lady took me to the wall....looked at me with this really mean, snarly face....and punched the shower button on the wall. And when I say punched, I mean it. Then she looked at me, nodded her head and walked away.

Well OK then.

So, I punched the button, mimicking her movements with every ounce of sarcasm I had, and took a shower. When I was done, she came over and pointed me in the direction of the hot tub. I will call this stage two, "pot of boiling water".

It was a small hot tub, and there were too many of us in it for my liking. The water was hotter than any hot tub I'd ever been in....and I found myself wishing I was still in the oven. At least I could wear those funny looking pajama things in the oven!!!!

One by one, we were removed from the "pot of water." Unfortunately, I was sitting in the hot tub with my back to the rest of the room. Actually, I shouldn't say unfortunately. If I had been seated where I could watch what was going on behind me, I don't think I'd be of sound mind to talk about it today.

How can I describe the sounds I was hearing?

OK...I got it!! Buy a chicken from the grocery store. Take it out of the package, and then slam it down on the counter top. Then, take you hands and start slapping at it. (spanking it, for lack of a better word) That slapping sound you are hearing???? Imagine there were 5 people with their own chickens, beating the crap out of them in your kitchen with you. That's what it sounded like was going on behind me.

And, it wasn't really far from the truth.

Yep, there were 5 padded massage tables in this room behind me. Each table had a small Korean woman wearing black bras and panties (very utilitarian looking, nothing Victoria Secret about it, so get your minds out of the gutters!!!).

These women were doing the "massages." But, not American style massages. There was nothing relaxing about it. Trust me!!!

These women scoured, yes...I said scoured....us from head to toe. They had these mitts they wore....made of a very rough material. And they used them to exfoliate every inch of our bodies.

Every. Single. Inch

(As a joke, Elaine got each of us one of these mitts as gifts, and gave them to us on the plane ride home. I keep mine in the shower, and use it to exfoliate my elbows and such if they need it.)

At one point, the lady told me to sit up. So...I started to sit up...and she smacked me on the forehead with the palm of her hand. Smacked me, for real. With the palm of her hand...ssssmack.

She again told me to sit up. So I started to sit up...and she smacked me on the forehead again.

Oh no she didn't!

I found myself wondering what the punishment would be, for beating up a Korean bath house lady??

She yelled at me to sit up again. I sat up, but was ready this time. I had my hands up and was ready to smack her back, when another little lady in black under garments shouted something. She came over, yelled at my lady a little...and then asked me to scoot up. It seems they wanted my head to hang off the table, so they could massage my neck or scalp or something.

I don't think my lady trusted me after that. She looked at me like she was afraid I was going to attack her at any minute. Actually made me feel a little better....I admit it. I can't say the exfoliation felt even close to good. It hurt like a son of a bitch, and I think I was missing the top 70 or so layers of skin. Everywhere!!!

EVERYWHERE!!!

I'd been stuck in an oven and baked....I'd been boiled....and now I'd been...hmmm...what's the cooking equivalent of what that little lady in black underpants had done? I'd been tenderized, peeled, and basted.

And don't forget....all of the things in this room had been done naked.

Butt. Friggin'. Naked.

And as each person finished, we were taken into the main locker room again...and handed another set of those comfy pink pajama things.

All I could think to myself was "Oh god, they still haven't given me my clothes yet. Now what???"

(to be continued, one more time)

Monday, January 19, 2009

Five Questions from Lyvvie

Lyvvie @ Lyvvie's Limelight sent me 5 interview questions this morning, so I thought I'd take a stab at them and see what new things we can all learn about Nej. :-)

1. Is there one time in your life you refer back to often and wish you could change. If you could go back and change it, would you?
There are many things I think back to, and wish I could change. But most of the time, I decide those choices actually led to some really good things happening to me, in the long run.
* Should I have gone to college straight out of high school, instead of waiting 2 semesters, and losing my multiple full ride scholarships?
* Should I have lied through my teeth when an ex co-worker gave me her work keys to return t to her boss, thus showing my employer that I knew she was quitting ahead of time? (When I told them the truth, they fired me.)
* Should I have put my fears behind me and completed the hiring process for the FBI?

All of those things I didn't do, led me to things that I've done instead. And...even though I wonder what would have happened if I'd done then....in the long run, I'm glad I didn't.

There ARE a handful of things I'd have done differently. And they are probably very similar to what other people would put on their list.
* I should have hung out more with my great grandmother, my aunt, and my grandfather....all before they died of cancer. They were awesome people that I loved to death, and I can't imagine all of the things they could have taught me.
* I should have run kicking and screaming from the doctor's office before agreeing to this medication! (well, maybe I should have run screaming from the office....running while kicking is never attractive, and usually results in landing on your face on the sidewalk)

2. What was your biggest fashion nightmare where you thought you looked the hottest but on reflection, not so much?
Oh man....that's another questions with a plethora of answers!!! :-)

* I think the 80's, in general, can probably be lumped into one big, horrible, fashion disaster for me. Layered socks, white jackets, jellies, stirrup pants....ugh!
* One of my prom dresses was purple...Barny purple....and I think it was actually supposed to be a bride's maid dress...not something someone should wear to a prom.
* Yellow...I should never, ever be allowed to wear yellow. It's a disaster on me, and if anyone ever sees me wearing yellow, you have my permission to tackle me and drag me into the shadows, before too many more people see it.
* But, the worst of all is what became known as my 'space slut' outfit. (sigh) Silver lamae short sleeved top, black mini (and I mean mini) skirt, knee high fishnet stockings, metallic silver heels. Was it a Judy Jetson Halloween costume? Nope! Was it a rave, club hopping outfit? Nope! It was my "get a load of this, see what you're missing by dumping me, I have no idea how silly I look, and won't realize it until days later" look.

3. Tell of a time you were really disappointed and how you got through it.
* Being dumped after a 4 year long relationship....that's a pretty big disappointment. And, it happened twice in a row for me. Two different guys, 4 years each. Can you imagine the fear I felt when Mot and I hit 4 years? Granted, we were married, just dating...but the lump in my throat fear was still there.

How did I get through it? I cried, I moped, I listened to Bette Midler (yes, I admit it). Then I found things to occupy my time. I cleaned my house (over and over), I worked overtime (lots of overtime). I made new friends, found new hobbies, and stayed up so late there was no possibility of laying in bed "thinking" about the disappointment.

4. What are your addictions; past and present?
* My couch and the TV that sits in front of it. It's true. I have so many hobbies, it's not even funny. But I will ignore them all if I, in a moment of weakness, sit on my couch....and (eek) turn on my TV. It's horrible.

If you're in a bad mood you can find shows that will cheer you up, or make your life look like a sitcom. If you're bored, it passes the time quite nicely. If you can't sleep, there's always something on that will put you out. If you're living paycheck to paycheck (as I have in my life), it's basically free entertainment. It's there for you in rain or shine (but not during those occasional power outages). It doesn't judge, or expect anything from you.

* Oreo cookies. I haven't had an Oreo for a number of years now. (sigh)

* Cary Grant movies. The guy is dreamy, hilarious, and classic. What more can I say?

5. What are your passions; past and present?
This is the most difficult question on the list. My passions?? It's sad really, but most days I don't feel as though I have one. I know people with the most amazing talents and passions....and I feel small and insignificant around them. Not because I can't do what they can....no. It's more because I wish I felt that drive...that passion for something as strongly as they do. Writing books, cooking, dance......if there is a hobby, an activity that can be done...there's a person out there with the passion to do it.

I'm still looking for mine. (If you see it, tell it to come visit me, please!) I'm a Jill of all trades, master of none. I've had a wide array of different careers (ie: jobs or things I do for a paycheck)....and I collect hobbies like a Philatelic collects stamps.

Maybe that's it...my passion is to experience as much as I can. My passion is take life by the horns, and step outside that comfort zone. My passion is do to things I never thought I would be able to do, and live to write about them.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm still shy, introverted and a big fat scaredy cat....so you won't find me jumping out of planes, riding bulls, or cliff diving. But I DO want to hike the Appalachian trail. I want to bike the GAP - C&O trail. I want to ride in a helicopter. I want to race (not drive) race a race car.

Lookout world! If I ever win the lottery, you won't know what hit you! I'm going to do it all, see it all, and still have time to sit in the mountains and watch the hummingbirds fly around my head.


Well, there you go, a little of Nej in a nutshell.

Thank goodness Lyvvie didn't ask if I was a "nose-picking, masturbating Phyllis Diller fan" as she threatened. I don't think I'm ready to come out of the closet on that one just yet. :-) :-) :-)

Weekend Update

Busy, busy, busy.

I escaped work (well, I left at 5:00....so, that doesn't really count as escape, per se). So, let's say I was able to get the heck out of Dodge (finally!) and head home. The quartet gals had to cancel our rehearsal that evening...so I was free!!! I contemplated hitting the gym, since my bag was in the trunk of my car.

After much contemplation (2 or 3 seconds at least) I decided to head straight home so Mot and I finished picking the place up for our weekend guest. It's not like our house is ever trashed.....we're pretty clean folk. But, it's nice having people over every once and a while, if for no other reason than to clean hidden dirt and dust you're able to ignore on a normal day. :-) :-)

Mot had the place pretty well picked up by the time I got home. The kitchen was cleaned, the bathroom was scrubbed, and he....get this...he dusted!! He hates dusting!!!

I finished picking up the vivarium tools and supplies, so I could hide them in a closet somewhere, cleaned upstairs, then we headed out to the grocery store. We needed dinner supplies for Saturday night.

It took Mot quite a while to finally settle on a dinner menu. He battled back and forth between a number of comfort food meals.....fried chicken, meatloaf, pork loin roast, etc......but finally settled on meatloaf.

Mel and Sheila arrived around 1:00 or so on Saturday and we headed off to our favorite place...The Nebraska Brewery. Sheila is a bit of a beer connoisseur and really enjoys a couple of their brews...so we try and eat there at least once every visit so she can take a growler of her favorite home.

(Mot loves their beer as well.....so we use Sheila as a convenient excuse to go, she doesn't mind!!)

After lunch, we headed over to World Market. All of the Omaha stores are closing, and the inventory liquidation sales have begun. The sales are great when these stores close...but it's getting depressing. Linens and Things went away not too long ago....and although we ended up getting a steal of a deal on a new set of knives and a copper core stainless steel set of pots and pans...it's still a bummer to see the stores closed.

After lunch (and a little shopping) we headed back to our house to hang out. We played some Guitar Hero (they brought us our copy of World Tour, and I have to say...the song selection, so far, is awesome!!) plus we had the laptop out so Mel. We'd attempted to run an HDMI cable to our TV, to watch episodes of our favorite shows online, on our TV. Picture was fine...but we weren't able to get the sound running. Mel fixed it. She rocks!!!

Mot put the meatloaf in the oven to cook....and we ate about 7:00 or so. It was marvelous (as all his cooking usually is). He's pretty hard on himself when it comes to his food, but I've only ever tasted one or two epic failures.

He once made spaghetti so hot, neither one of us could eat it....and he LOVES hot food. I never could understand why he was trying to make spicy spaghetti. :-)

We started watching some episodes of The Big Bang Theory after dinner. Quite possibly the funniest show ever!!! They'd never seen it, so we hauled out a couple of disks, and entertained ourselves for a couple hours. The show brings tears to your eyes. :-)

Between the beer at lunch, the margaritas before supper, the margaritas during supper, and then the pomegranate martinis after dinner...we were all feeling pretty decent. But it wasn't too long before we were all ready for bed.

Sunday am, we got up, and Mot made his biscuits and gravy. (heaven on earth!) We cleaned up, dissected the Sunday newspaper, then headed out to see what we could find to do. We were all barely awake, and now stuffed...so staying in the house would have resulted in napping and all-out laziness. :-)

Mel suggested finding an Asian market, but all of the ones we checked weren't open, so we headed to Costco, then Nebraska Furniture Mart.

We almost bought a Wii at Costco, and we almost replaced Mot's computer upstairs at the mart. It was then we decided window shopping probably wasn't a good idea.

Heck, window shopping is NEVER a good idea for us. (hehehe)

When we got back, we sliced one of the loaves of ciabatta bread Mot made the day before in half (long ways) and made some tasty pizzas for a light lunch.

I'm sure I gained 8 or 9 pounds over the course of the weekend. :-)

Just as they were getting ready to head back to Des Moines, the phone rang. We let the machine get it so we could say our goodbye's. The caller didn't leave a message on the home phone, but we noticed both Mot's and my cell phone also had missed calls. Then the home phone rang again. That's never a good sign.

Mot's grandmother fell while out for lunch, and was taken to the hospital. We rushed over to see what was up. After an hour or so wait, the doctors finally came back with xray results, and told us nothing was broken (thank goodness!). She was still experiencing some pretty decent pain in her abdomen, so they scheduled a CAT scan. She was in a drug induced stupor, so Mot and I headed home, and waited for the results.

Turns out there was some internal issues caused by the fall, and they put her into surgery right away. We got a call late last night that everything went very well, and she was recovering in ICU. Mot is heading over there now to see how she's doing today. She should be awake and ready for visitors. (p.s. She's 96 or 97. The woman is strong as an ox, mentally and physically.)

You know....it's getting so every weekend/holiday update I post has a family member in the hospital. It's not something I want to get used to. It could stop and I wouldn't complain.

Friday, January 16, 2009

If it kills me...(update)

Here's my list of what I wanted to get accomplished...and updates on what actually happened when I got home (not that any of you really care). :-)

1) laundry - all of it...folded, put away, the works!!! I did actually get it all done...folded and put away. Well, except the bag of Mot's uniforms, that I found in the bedroom as I was getting ready for bed. Those are in the washing machine now...but I'm still counting my laundry night as a success. It's amazing, I actually found there is a floor under all those clothes that were piled in the laundry room. And, my closet....can I tell you about all the choices of clothes I had to wear today? It's amazing!!!! :-)

2) put books away - we've acquired a million books (maybe a slight exaggeration) in the last week...and they are just piled up on the desk in the den All done. We have one wall that is completely full. There are nothing but shelves on this wall, and no more room for books. How cool is that? :-) (yes, we're book nerds, I admit it)

3) clean the bathroom (sexy, eh?) This was a big strike. I thought about cleaning it, briefly. But decided I'd just be cleaning it again Saturday morning before our guests arrived...so, I'll just wait until then. It's called time management. (hehe)

4) put that fish tank away (for the weekend)...the vivarium work is still progressing...but I'm getting sick of it sitting in my living room....especially with guests coming over this weekend.... Well, because I'm terrified to move the fish tank and mess up all the stuff we've done to it so far, I asked Mot to move it for me. He's going to do it today. So, officially, I got the tank moved last night...or at least set the plans in motion for it to be done. That's close enough, right????



I walked in the door last night, and immediately changed into my new pajamas. Ahhhh...comfy clothes. Therapy for the soul!!!

We ate dinner soon after I got home...which was mighty tasty, even though Mot didn't look at the package of sausages before he cooked with them. During the meal realized he cooked his pasta dish using bratwurst instead of Italian sausage. I still brought the leftovers in today for lunch. It was tasty! :-)

Also, while folding (for storage) the last of the blankets from our upstairs closet....I watched my first episode of Ghost Hunters International for the season.

Um......hmmmm......how do I say this without offending those that are fond of the international ghost hunter failure? Whoops....did I say failure? Well, that's what I was thinking, but probably not the smoothest, and nicest, way to put it.

GHI is horrible!!! I have hopes it will get better...but I miss Jay and Grant. :-(

When a person actually picks folding laundry over being glued to the TV in anticipation...you know the show just isn't cutting it. H.O.R.R.I.B.L.E.

Mot spent the evening playing Wow again...big surprise, eh??? I was supposed to be getting my hair cut, so him playing didn't really upset me much. It was what happened yesterday afternoon with the game that annoyed me.

(warning, wife vs WoW rant)

I called home to talk. I was having a bad day here at work...and just needed a sane (ish) person to talk to. He was doing that whole thing where I speak, or ask a question....and he responds, with a three second delay.

This means he's playing on the computer and not paying attention to a word I say.

He'll say he hears me and what I'm saying.....but he isn't really. When he responds with that delay, it means "hang on honey, this game is more important.....I'll talk to you when I can."

{sigh}

I can hear him clicking away on the keyboard and mouse...and with every click...my blood pressure rises one or two notches.

When the game beats me out for my hubby's attention...well, I get annoyed.... jealous.... frustrated... embarrassed......

You pick a term, they all apply.

:-)

Whatever will I do with that man....that poor "addicted WoW" man of mine??

Thursday, January 15, 2009

If it kills me....

I will get something accomplished at my house tonight, if it kills me. My hair stylist had to go home with a sick child, and I didn't bring gym clothes...so the night is all mine to actually get something done!!!!

It's the same, normal, boring crap....but it's sneaky. It's eluded me all week!!!

1) laundry - all of it...folded, put away, the works!!!
2) put books away - we've acquired a million books (maybe a slight exaggeration) in the last week...and they are just piled up on the desk in the den
3) clean the bathroom (sexy, eh?)
4) put that fish tank away (for the weekend)...the vivarium work is still progressing...but I'm getting sick of it sitting in my living room....especially with guests coming over this weekend....

If I get all of that done, I'll do a happy dance for everyone to see tomorrow. Well....for everyone to imagine that I'm doing.

Yeah, that's the ticket.

Don't you just hate it when.....

...you're in the middle of a very non-paperless task, you reach over to grab the stapler, and you staple your two pages together. But, something doesn't feel quite right. You look down, and there isn't a staple in your pages. You're out.

You lean over, open your desk drawer, and see that you don't have a box of staples.

(sigh)

So now you have to walk down the hall, to the supply closet to get a box of staples.

When you get back to your desk, you realize that all the rigmarole just totally through off the work "zone" you were in.

So you say, fuck it.....get a cup of coffee, read a couple of blogs, check the weather (yep, still colder than hell)...and finally decide that you should get back to what you were doing.


It's about as bad as lifting up a suitcase, that you thought was full, and it wasn't. So you almost throw it through the window you're standing beside.

Or...

When you're walking down a flight of stairs, and your arms are full of laundry. You think there's one more step, and there isn't. So, when you take that last step, it feels like your knees are being jammed up through your armpits.

Yes, it's been one of those days. :-)

Brrrrr.....



I love the cold......

But....

15 below, 30 below wind chill. Yeah, I could handle temperatures in the positives......and not complain. :-) :-)

Mot has refused to shovel the driveway. He's gone on shoveling strike. But - it's supposed to be in the 40's this weekend, and it'll melt anyway. I don't blame him for not wanting to shovel in this cold.

Don't blame him at all.


(picture found online at: http://www.boulderfarmers.org/Newsletters/9-26-07-Hitting_our_stride.htm)

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Waaaay Back When-sday, Episode 3

The Korean Bath House

A few years ago, the chorus I sang in was asked to sing in Korea, in a competition held during the APEC Summit. President Bush was going to attend the meetings, and the organizers were hoping to get an American chorus to participate in honor of him attending.

Well, anyway....long story short, we were selected. The trip lasted 10 days, and is a million posts by itself. But, there was one story, in particular, I'd love to share.

Elaine (the member of our chorus that was organizing the trip), used to be the USO liaison in Korea. She lived there for a number of years before moving back to the states. She suggested we spend one night experiencing a local Korean bath house.

After spending a week with 20 women (and assorted husbands) touring around Korea, singing on military bases, teaching music classes, and competing in the choral competition.....let me say, the idea of massages and such sounded wonderful!!! There were quite a few of us who signed up.

The bus that had been driving us around was only available during the day, so we had to be taken to the bath house in small groups...via mini vans. We were one of the first vans to leave the hotel. None of us spoke a lick of Korean, except for the occasional hello and thank you (and "no thank you, I don't want to buy your products").

The small Korean lady who was driving our vehicle drove us around and through the city. We had no idea where we were. After driving through some of the creepiest looking alleyways, she finally stopped the van and got out. We all sat there for a minute, then decided she must have wanted us to follow her.

She led us through a door in the building she was standing behind, and into a small lobby (lobby = small 5 x 5 foot area, with nothing in it, but an elevator door). She pushed the elevator button, and ushered us in. Just as the door was closing, she rushed out of the elevator, into the lobby. As the door was closing it's final 2 or 3 inches, she waved...and ran away.

Allllllllrighty then.

All of us stood in the elevator, not wanting to say what we were thinking. Finally someone spoke....... "Where we just sold into some sort of prostitution ring?" I rummaged through my pockets, and found I had nothing that could be used as a weapon if needed.

The elevator 'dinged' and we all took a deep breath. The doors opened to a small reception desk, with two ladies. They were looking at us with huge, uncertain eyes. We stepped up to the counter, and tried to tell them why we were there. They spoke zero English, and we spoke zero Korean. Eventually both parties were speaking louder than they needed to. Somehow, speaking louder makes it easier to understand a language you don't know?????

Who knows how long this would have continued if Elaine hadn't finally stepped off that same elevator with the next van load of girls. She explained everything to the flustered women behind the counter.

The whole group was led into a small locker room, and were each handed a set of clothing. Shorts and a shirt....pajama style. We were to wear them, and nothing else....and change right there. The door to the room was still open to the lobby, and we all just stood there. Finally, one of ladies signed and closed to the door for us. Silly shy American girls!!

(if only we knew how un-shy we were going to be by the end of the night)

After we were changed, we were taken into the first of many rooms. This was stage one. I call it "The Oven."

Technically, it was a dry sauna. A very, very, very hot sauna. There were no chairs and no benches...so everyone had to sit on the floor. Each of us had our own wooden pillow to place our heads on while we laid on the floor.

After 45 minutes of baking time, two women came into the room. They literally walked from person to person, pinching everyone's knees.

Some people must have been more "done" than others....because they asked some of our group to leave with them.

15 minutes later, we decided it was our time to leave as well. We walked through the door and found the main dressing room. As we walked into the room, a group of three local women walked in from the lobby. They proceeded to strip naked right in front of us, then walk over to these.....well.........stalls.

Within each stall was an outhouse looking seat. Basically a bench with a toilet seat on it. They all sat down on the toilet seats (naked) and zipped themselves in. Yes, I said zipped. There was a "cover" that went around the whole stall, and zipped up to their neck. All you could see where their heads. Under the bench seats, were.....well......containers of steaming fluids. Once they were zipped into the stalls.....whatever was under the benches, steamed up through the toilet seat holes onto (into?) them.

I've seen some strange things in my life....but that took the cake. These ladies were giggling like school girls. And I never did figure out what treatment they were receiving. I thought it better to not ask. I probably didn't want to know.

Just as they got themselves zipped in, our bath house ladies walked in from another door. They were less than happy we'd taken ourselves out of the 'oven' without their permission, and shoo'd us back in, with obvious frustration.

As we returned to the oven, I couldn't help but wonder what was behind the door those bath house ladies had just come through. The noises coming from the room were less than reassuring.

I looked around at those of us still left in the oven, and wondered what happened to the ones that had been taken out. Were they in the room behind that door? What had I gotten myself into??

(to be continued)

Let's catch up..

Life has gotten away from me. My blog has been severely neglected.

I'm sorry blog!

Let's see....

Christmas was interesting, both days of it. I didn't mention that my sister announced she was pregnant. Another little niece or nephew on the way. Unexpected and unplanned for them....but everyone was excited.

Happy New Years!!! We went to eat at Cracker Barrel with my parents and my sister's family.

We ate at 5:30 with the entire elderly population of Gretna, NE. :-)

On the way home, we were at a loss of what do to. So, we stopped by the nearest grocery store, bought some booze (that was a given!) and went home. The plan.....drink as many margaritas as we can while watching the Lord of the Rings trilogy. At midnight, say Happy New Year!...and then go to bed. 7 hours into the first movie, some friends of ours arrived on the doorstep. We finished watching the first movie, put in the second. Watched about 9 hours of it, then midnight came and went.

January 2nd, 2009 - Happy Birthday Nej!!!! Mot played Wow for 3 hours that morning, and then we finally left the house to run some errands and such. A little after lunch, he looked at me and said happy birthday. He knew that he couldn't hide that he'd forgotten. :-) I'll not let him live it down, trust me!! :-)

We've been working on the vivarium here and there since I first posted it's beginning. (and no, the curtains are still not done!!) I need to start a post on it's creation. Here's a little teaser....

.....an ambulance trip is involved.

Everyone is OK....and thank goodness I had my camera handy!!!! :-) I'll download some of those pictures when I have time this week.

I had to go back to work on the 5th of January, with everyone else in town. It was just like I'd never been gone. Same issues, same problems, same craziness.....nothing new.

We've gone from tshirt weather, to frigid -23 degree weather (this morning)....and every stage in between. Snow, freezing rain, horribly cold winds....but I admit it, I still love winter!!!!

At some point over the holiday, I took the time to put all of our books on a spreadsheet. I'm getting sick of going to our favorite store (Half Price Books), and wondering "do we have this one already?" Official count was just over 400 books at home. Sure doesn't look like that many on the shelves.

Sunday afternoon, Mot was bored. He wasn't playing on the computer, there was nothing on TV. So.....he came up with something to do. During his master's degree, he....um......acquired a very large (3 gallon I think) Pyrex container from the biology lab. This "jar" has been the resting place for our loose change for as long as we've been married. In our less than rich (really poor) early years of marriage, we raided the jar numerous time. Lately, we've been good about leaving the change alone. For some reason, on Sunday afternoon, he couldn't stand it any longer. We spread out a sheet on the living room floor and counted it out. An hour or so later, we knew how much was in it (we didn't count the pennies, or we'd still be sitting there counting!), our legs were asleep from sitting on the floor, and our fingers were disgusting. Makes you realize how dirty money really is. Yuck!

Sometime early early Monday morning, mother nature decided we hadn't seen enough snow...and dropped a couple more inches down upon us. The weather people didn't forecast it either, so Monday's commute to work was.....well, adrenaline filled.

I'm pretty sure my car escaped without damage.

To be honest, I was so happy to finally get here, I forgot to look and see if there was any. And now, on Wednesday, I can say I still haven't looked. The car drives fine, there are no thumping or thudding sounds coming from that front tire...so I'm pretty sure all is well.

A downhill stretch of road, insane snow and ice, and nearly bald tires = not good. I got up close and personal with a very tall street curb. As I was sliding towards it, I was hoping the car would hop the curb.....but I had no such luck. It was a bit taller than I expected....and my car came to a sudden stop, against it.

And lastly, I had to leave work early yesterday. My sister had her first ultrasound (she's 4 1/2 months along), and was told the worst two words any parent could ever hear "no heartbeat."

Sis and her hubby are doing well, considering. I spent all afternoon and evening at her place yesterday. We all spent a little time being upset, and allot of time trying to find things to do to keep our minds off of it.

I think that pretty much catches us all up on the major events. Pretty boring really.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Two strikes...one more and I'm outta here!!!

Where would I go, and what is it I'm leaving? Well, I don't really know. But I do know that I'm mad, I'm frustrated, and I feel like I'm 70 friggin' years old!!!

Let me back up and explain.

I hate taking the garbage out. I find that not many people enjoy it really. I also like things to be symmetrical. Again, not a rare characteristic in people.

We have two garbage cans in our kitchen. They are the same size, same shape, same everything. They are narrow, but taller, so as not to take up too much space. One is garbage, and one is recycling.

After much searching, I found garbage bags that fit the can perfectly. They aren't too short, so they don't fall into the can when you throw away those first few items of garbage. The have drawstrings, so I don't have to try and tie the darned thing closed, and they are those Force Flex bags....which means they have texture to them. Why is that important?? Have you ever tried to take the bag out of your garbage can, and the whole garbage can is lifted off the ground...because of the suction created by the bag laying flat against the side of the can???

Well, if the bag is textured, you just lift up on the bag, and it slides out. No fighting with it!!! I love it. I know that love seems like a strong word for garbage bags, but I do love them.

About two months ago, my grocery store stopped carrying them. Then I couldn't find them at the hardware store either, or WalMart...or ANYWHERE!!! I quickly emailed their customer support.

My worst fear had come true. They had discontinued the product, with no plans of replacing them. "We sell them in black." Well, that's great, but my garbage company wants them in white....AND....black bags in my kitchen will look horrible. Argh! (yes, I'm a nut!)

I'm not an obsessive compulsive...but I was raised by one. So, some of the tendencies slipped off onto me. It's annoying, but it is what it is. :-)

It's been two months, we're on our last box of bags...but I'm calm. I can deal with this. I can handle it. I'll need to buy new garbage cans, but Mot will deal with it by shaking his head, rolling his eyes, and saying nothing!!! He's so great!

So, if it's been two months, and I'm calm...why this post?

Well, it happened again today!!!! And this one really hurts!

I hate pantyhose. Anyone who's worn them knows where I"m coming from on this one. Plus, anyone that is shaped the same way I am, REALLY knows where I'm coming from.

When I was a size 0, I was shaped the same way. It has nothing to do with being overweight. Longer legs, shorter torso, and very boy shaped. Meaning, even when there is no fat on me, I have no waist. Shoulder, abs, hips, thighs....if you are looking at me from the front, it's all the same width.

I do have boobs and a butt - but they stick out in the correct directions (i.e. not to the sides). So, when wearing normal pantyhose I have problems.

The short torso I was talking about, means I have a short rise. So, to buy jeans that sit on my natural waist, I need to by low rise jeans. Low rise jeans being in style was a godsend. Low rise fit me like regular rise fit most.

So, when wearing pantyhose, they go up to my armpits almost. And, they roll down if I move. (and I've found moving a very convenient thing during the day) :-)

Why am I telling you all this? Well, because I found the solution to the problem this summer. Thigh high pantyhose. Most thigh highs you find, have this annoying lacy crap at the top...which is very uncomfortable. Plus, thigh highs aren't really the style, so they are harder to find.

But - being the resilient person I am...I found some that are awesome!!! Spanx makes them, and they are the bomb. They stay where they need to, they are uber comfortable, and they are durable. (don't snag on a whim)

I went to order more today, and they are not on the Spanx website (well, I take that back..they are, but only one size).

UH OH!!!

I looked on the Nordstrom's webpage. Same story. OH NO!!!!!

I immediately emailed Spanx, and they just responded. I was terrified to open the email.

(gulp)

They are being discontinued with no plans to bring them back.

I'm going to cry. I really am. Over pantyhose for crying out loud!! Now what do I do???????

This is why I feel like I'm 70. I love a product, I want to use that product forever, and they go and get rid of it, without asking.

(They did an episode of Seinfeld about this same problem...but the product was different.)

OK, so maybe the sales aren't what they want them to be...but if the sales are that low...shouldn't they know who buys them? Shouldn't they at least call us, the loyal consumer, and tell them what's happening? Is that too much to ask????

OK....I'm going to go cry now. I mean, why not? There's nothing else I can do.

If anyone who reads this really cares for me....and if you're really my friends...please contact Spanx and Glad. Please have your friends contact Spanx and Glad. These are the products we can't live without. Tell them for me! Please!!!

(And if you only want to help me with one product, chose the pantyhose, whether you're a gal or a dude, that's the one that hurts the most!!!)

** Spanx, Her Thighness, Size 2, black and nude

** Glad, Force Flex, 30 gal, white


I thank you for your support in such trying times!!!!

Friday, January 9, 2009

Doctors

Hubby's been complaining about some pretty hefty shoulder pain for a couple of months now. He's blamed it on sleeping positions and large, overweight ladies.

(for those of you that don't know, he's a paramedic/fireman - that make alot of calls to extremely overweight people, that need lifted)

Anyway, on Tuesday, he was supposed to go swimming at the Y after he got off work. But, at 7:00 am, he walked through our front door as usual.

Nej "Why aren't you swimming?"

Mot "My shoulder is killing me after swimming yesterday."

Nej (my standard response) "Make an appointment."

Mot (sigh) "But I don't wanna." (pouting)

Nej "Fine, then keep hurting! Would you make the appointment for me, if not for yourself?"

Mot (sigh) "Fine" (still pouting)



Today, the day of his appointment, I get a phone call here at work.


Mot (obviously aggravated) "Why am I going again? My shoulder feels fine today."

Nej "Because you haven't been using it. And now the inflammation, or whatever it is, is better."

Mot "But I don't wanna go. It feels fine. Why do I have to go? I don't wanna."

Nej (sigh) "fine, don't go....go swimming instead...and then call them back to reschedule when you're done"

Mot "I changed how I'm sleeping, and it's better. Besides, it's a long ways to drive to the doctor. And....I don't wanna go."

Nej (sigh) "whatever"

Mot "Fine, I'm calling to cancel now. What's the number?"

Nej "I don't know...I didn't write it down. I didn't know you were going to chicken out and not go."

Mot "You call them and cancel for me."

Nej "Oh, HELL no. This is all you, buddy!"

Mot "I'd do it for you."

Nej "Not if you thought I should be going."

Mot "What's the number?"


He's as bad as a three year old when it comes to going to a doctor.

I'll let you know when he finally goes to the doctor. (changing how he sleeps isn't going to fix this, I speak from experience) :-) :-)

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Best Laid Plans

Life has a way of getting in the way of life....have you ever noticed? You have your day planned out, and none of it goes as it did in your brain that morning. You continue to adjust, shuffle, and scrap bits and pieces of the plan...until, at 8:34 pm, none of it happened the way you'd hoped.

My alarm went off at 5:30 this morning...as it always does. Somehow, in the two weeks of holiday vacation, my hubby hid this in his brain, and refuses to admit it. So, when my alarm went off at 5:30 this morning...he let out a string of cuss words, preceded by his "oh, for crying out loud" sigh.

Normally, my alarm goes off at 5:30, then I hit snooze three times, and get up around 6:00. I putter around the house, switch over some loads of laundry, load or unload the dishwasher, put the cushions back on the couch the way they should be, jump in the shower, feed the animals, leave for work. It's my schedule.

But, today, I put that plan on hold....because Mot seems to think it's a horrible plan. Let me ask you blogger nation. There are snooze button people, and there aren't...right? Me being told that I have to get up the first time my alarm goes off...is the same thing as me telling hubby that he has to hit the snooze three times. Right?

We're not compatible when it comes to methods of waking up in the am. What do we do???

So, I turn off my alarm and tell him to wake me up when he's out of the shower. Does he come in and gently wake me up? Nope, he retaliates for the 5:30 alarm...by yelling at me to wake up from the living room. Argh!!!

Fine, so I get up, get ready...still with a smile. I mean, the little things in life aren't worth arguing over, right? Right??

Work goes basically OK. Nothing to write home again, nothing to blog about. Just boring, and usual. Well, except this....this is what I came into this morning. I should have taken it as a sign.

After fixing the chair (with what is surely a temporary fix), the morning continues on as normal...until Mot emails me, asking what my plans are for the evening.

"I'm going home from work, feeding the animals, changing into workout clothes, then heading back to the gym. I'll use some cardio machines for 30-45 minutes, then jump into the Tai Chi class. Why?"

"Can you get a guest pass for someone to go to the Tai Chi class with you?"

"Yes, who..and what night?"

"Tonight"

"OK...for who?"

(silence - no return email)

Finally, a response "What are you plans for lunch?"

"Nothing, I brought my usual pbj and chips. Why? OK...what's going on?"

(silence - no response)

Crap, is he hurt, why does he want to go to lunch, why isn't he going to be at work over lunch. What happened? Is everything OK??

My phone rings. "So, I'm on my way home. I got the day off. They were heavy on people, and I put in for the day."

Well, that's pretty awesome!! I'll get to see him for lunch, and tonight. Completely unexpected...and very nice!!!!

Healthy (healthier) lunch scrapped, I'll eat it tomorrow...no big deal.

After work, I come home....and he mentions wanting to run to a couple of stores. OK...well, I can work out at home. One of the stores sells heaters, and I need to get one for the gym in the basement anyway...that will be perfect.

Running to the hardware store then home, turned into hardware store then Williams Sonoma. We didn't' get home until 7:30. OK...I can workout for an hour, still have 30 minutes to wind down before going to bed. No problem.

Nope, I can tell he's eye-balling the vivarium that we're constructing in the living room. Hmmmmmm....if I go work out, he'll just stare at it, fiddle with it, and then upset himself because he rushed into it and did something without planning it out. He suffers from lack of patience, and ADHD. He'll admit it freely.

Fine, we can work on this for a little while, and while it's drying, I can workout. I'll just have to read in bed a little longer to relax before falling asleep. But it's worth it!!! Spending time with hubby is always a plus, especially when I didn't expect to get to do it tonight.

Construction goes until 8:15. Well...I can still workout for 45 minutes, it's better than nothing, right?

I grab a DVD, and head downstairs. The new heater has thawed the icy chill that is our basement in the winter. Awesome! I put the movie, in....and it won't load. Hmmm.....and not only will it not load, it won't spit it back out. Argh. And, now I can't even get the darn thing to shut off. It's just flashing "open, open, open." Yes, I understand, I pushed the eject button..now EJECT DAMN YOU!!

"Mot, the DVD player ate my movie!!"

"Which one?"

What the heck kind of question is that? Can't you sense the frustration on my voice? Don't you understand I need a knight in shining armor worse than oxygen right now? As if it matters WHICH movie it is?? It's the movie I want to watch, while working out, that I'm not getting to do. And...................

Uh oh....I'm starting to get frustrated. I can feel the patience escape my body at an astronomical rate. 10 seconds to complete meltdown..tears and all.

Nothing today is going the way I'd hoped. Granted, most of it was different in a good way...but the way I woke up sucked...and not getting to work out blows goats.

(sigh)

OK, nevermind, I won't work out. Damn it...take that!!!

I grab my laptop and head upstairs. Mot was using it today for bread recipes, and let it run out of battery. No problem...I can plug it in.

Crap, Norton did it's thing before it shut down last....so, after turning it on, I now have to turn it off so everything will run.

To quote my mother..."god damn fucking ass son of a bitch!!"

(she can cuss with the best of them, and that's my all time favorite combination) :-)

Shit, here come those frustrated tears again. Back girly tears...back!!!!! It's just a laptop. I only want to post a blog entry. There's no crying in blogging!!!!!

OK, I'm going to bed. Maybe tomorrow will be better??

Happy Birthday Mom!!!!




Oh, and Elvis too!!! :-)

This Can't Be Good




Yep, the poor thing has had it. Actually, it's a fairly new chair. It's just a REALLY poor design. It's a good thing I don't lean back on it much at all...could be dangerous! :-)

I found an Allen wrench, but it's just a little too small. Maybe I should have stayed home today? Is this a sign?? Uh oh!! :-)

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Waaaay Back When-sday, Episode 2

Can you believe it? I'm actually remembering to post this, and on a Wednesday even! This is two weeks in a row.

But really, the first week doesn't count. It was the day I thought of (stole) the idea...and I was trying to find a catchy title for it. "Way back When-sday" is catchy, right???

Anyway.....

I got a request from friend Izzy at Escape from Dullsville for the story of how Mother Nature, Karma (or whomever you think we should blame) brought Mot and Nej together.

When people ask where we met, the short and sweet answer is "Fencing." Yep...pointy sharp objects, funny masks and all.

But, the short answer just isn't going to do for a Way Back When-sday post, will it? Nope!!!

Mot's side of the story basically (and I mean basically) goes like this....
"My mom fell off their back deck while painting the house, so I left school (getting his PhD) to come home and help dad take care of her. (side note, mom recovered fully) After I'd been back from Illinois for a while, I decided to look up some friends. We'd been fencing together for years. I arrived at fencing, one Sunday afternoon, and saw this chick. She had big hair and a nice butt. We started dating, I moved in, we got married."

You'd have to ask him for the expanded version, but I haven't gotten much more out of him than the big hair and nice butt comment. :-)

Nej's side of the story goes something like this.....
I hadn't dated much previous to meeting Mot. I'd just come off of my second 4-year relationship, and was currently dating a dude older than my dad.

(Yes, yes, I know...I can hear you all now.....ewwwwww!!!! But come on, give me a chance to explain. I was convinced that any male my age - or even close - had the brain power and relationship availability of a 1 year old. He was good looking...in a Sean Connery, Harrison Ford kind of way. He had a good paying job, WASN'T a musician (both of the 4-year relationships were with musicians - ugh!), and he seemed to really want to make me happy. He wasn't self-absorbed and selfish. He was from Arizona, tanned, and wore loafers and no socks with his suits.)

These things probably don't explain my behavior, but this is the story of how I met Mot, not old guy Eric (yeah, that's what my friends called him). :-)

So, old guy Eric moved...I was crushed, and decided that relationships, in general, were a thing to steer clear of totally. I needed hobbies, I needed things to do that didn't involve going with a boyfriend.

That day, I kid you not, my best buddy called me and was telling me about this dude she met at work. He taught fencing classes. Fencing! How cool is that? Let's do it! I was game, so we signed up.

The first day of fencing, I kid you not, the first day.....this dude walks into the building. He was wearing rugged "I actually go outside" shorts, a Coors Light tshirt, and sandals. When he walked into the room, everyone looked at him. He wasn't talking, and he didn't make an entrance, he just had this "thing" about him. All of the fencers that seemed to be friends and seemed to have known each other for quite some time even stopped to look at him when he came in. They all went to him, talked to him...he was the center of attention. But not because he demanded it. It was because, well....sometimes people just demand attention without knowing it.

I could tell that he was someone I wanted to get to know. Ugh! I didn't even last one week into my mission of swearing off men forever! Damn it!

I had come straight from work (I managed a grocery store at the time)...so I wasn't dressed to meet someone new. My hair was out of control curly because it had been a crazy day at work. I was wearing grubby jeans and a really ugly polo shirt (that I can picture in my head to this day).

I thought to myself "how can I find out who this dude is, meet him when I look better...while still avoiding him today?"

I sat down in a chair next to my best bud, and did my best to ignore him.

The person that my best friend worked with, the instructor of the fencing classes we'd signed up for, came over. He wanted to go out with me, and said he had a friend he was going to fix up with my friend.

Ugh! This dude just creeped me out, and now he...of all the people in this room...he wanted to go out with me. Makes my swearing off of men all the easier, if you ask me! He walked away while seeming to ignore the look of disgust I must have had on my face. When he returned, guess who he had with him??

Mr Coors Light tshirt! The dude I wanted to date!!! Ugh...you can't fix him up with my friend!!!

It was about then, they called the fencing club to it's end for the day. We all went to the bar down the street for drinks. (I found out later, they really did more socializing than fencing.)

We crammed like 14 people into a booth...then drank the afternoon and evening away.

At one point, Mr. Coors Light asked my friend if she was a masochist. (she is) I asked him "definition 1 or definition 2?" Look it up, there were (at the time) two definitions in Webster's Dictionary. One is liking pain in a general sense...two is liking pain when it comes to sex.

Anyway.......Coors Light gave me the strangest look. Which, it turns out, was him realizing that he couldn't live the rest of his life without me. How was I supposed to know that not speaking one word all night, and then asking a simple question was the key to his heart? :-) :-)

I had decided, while sitting in that booth with a bunch of strangers...staring at Mr. Coors Light, that I was not going to be the one to ask him out. I was always the one that asked men out, and you see how well that was going so far. I wasn't going to ask him out, I wasn't going to ask his name. HE needed to make all the moves, ask all the questions, and show the initiative. 100%

If he did all of that, it was meant to be.

The night was getting late, I had to work uber early the next morning, so I left. As I'm walking to my car, I was getting more and more bummed. He didn't ask me anything. He just said goodnight. Ugh! Oh well.

A few days later, I'd forgotten about Mr. Coors Light. My buddy (that convinced me to go fencing with her - which was fun by the way!!) called me. She says "you'll never guess what I'm calling to ask you!!"

It turns out Mr. Coors Light was searching the world over to find me. He was asking all kinds of people if they knew me...and none of them did. (I'm such a wallflower, I'm the wind, no one knows I'm there, unless I blow your patio furniture over or something.) :-)

He had called a friend, who called a friend, who called a friend...etc, etc....who eventually called my buddy.

I, quite calmly, told her it was ok to give him my number. (while internally I was jumping for joy...NO ONE had ever sought me out...never!!!)

He called the next day, and asked me to meet him for lunch. (seems he didn't know I lived an hour away) We decided to meet for dinner instead.

That's pretty much how it happened. We went out to dinner with a friend of his along (guess he didn't trust me for dinner alone??) Then we went out on a date date later that weekend. All of his belongings were moved into my house within a month, and we got married a year and a half later.

The End

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Is he back??


My poltergeist, is he back?

I'm not crazy, I used to have one. I swear. It's one of those strange things about me that makes people think to themselves "wow, this blogger lady is psycho!!" :-)

Let me give you a few examples. (There are a ton to pick from...but these are good enough examples for the purpose of this post.)

#1, When I was a kid, things of mine would come up missing all the time.

Yes, I had a smaller sister who stole things from me. (in fact, she would steal them, put them in a plastic bag, and bury them in the back yard - but that's another story altogether). And yes, I was a kid - kids lose things. I acknowledge both of those facts.

But....

Sometimes, it wasn't me or my sister.

One day, I'm home alone. No one is there, but me. Sis was off somewhere doing something, and our parents were at work. I'm brushing my hair (at the time, my hair was well past my butt in length, so brushing it was something I had to do all the time).

Anyway (I'm having a hard time staying with the story today, can you tell?)....

I'm brushing my hair, and the phone rings. I put my brush down on the bed, and go out to the kitchen to get the phone. After a couple minutes, I hang up and go back to my bedroom. No brush on the bed. No brush in the bedroom anywhere.

Did I put it away on my way to answer the phone? No brush in the bathroom where it goes.

Did I take it out to the kitchen with me? No brush in the kitchen.

Hmmmm.....I walk back to the bedroom...and there it is. In the hallway, right in front of my bedroom door, on the floor.

No one is home but me.

#2, When I moved out of my parents house, because I had cats, I couldn't live in an apartment. So, I bought a mobile home. Not a manufactured house, or whatever they call them now. A "made before I was born, aluminum can, no insulation, trailer park" mobile home.

When you buy a mobile home, you don't get a deed, you get a registration....the same as with a vehicle.

I got home, put the registration on the kitchen counter, under a book (so it wouldn't blow away as I was moving things in the house). My great uncle stopped by with a storage chest for me...and helped me move it into the house. We put it in the bedroom and he left.

No one else came into the house, there was no one with me that day.

I lifted up the book later in the afternoon...no registration.

Hmmmmm.....there's almost nothing else in the house, I had just started moving in. I looked around, kinda freaking out....couldn't find it.

Finally, I gave up. These things had been happening to me my whole life, and they eventually show up. The little poltergeist shit eventually gives it back.

I walk back into the bedroom and open up the storage chest to check out the inside.

Guess what's in it? The damn registration!!! There was no one in the house with me. I had been alone all day, except for my uncle helping me move that chest into the bedroom. I was with him the whole time, it was heavy, our hands were full. He didn't take the registration out from under my book, and put it in the chest.

{sigh}

My hubby can tell you that it happens all the time. Well, it did.

I haven't had anything happen since we've moved to Omaha, into our new house.

Until now.

My watch is missing. I don't know if he (my little friend from the paranormal world) is back....or if I should blame it on my cat. Morgan is a thief. But, after carefully looking under every piece of furniture in the house with a flashlight, I can't find it.

It's been a week and hasn't shown up. My poltergeist at least returned things...usually the same day. So, I think it's my cat.

Either way, this stinks! I really liked that watch!!!! :-) :-) :-)